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"It's not a problem, only an inconvenience"

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I have to admit it.  My husband, Jim, is the smartest person I know.

We’ve been married since 1988 and together since 1983.  He’s always been there.  My rock.  The guy who puts up with me and my crazy ideas.  Although he still cringes when he hears the words, “I’ve been thinking”, he listens and let’s me run with whatever I come up with.  We both share a passion for helping others and our community; hence the www.timetoplay.com project with the vision of people helping people and the mission to bring ideas to us “worker bees” to help make our lives better.

Unfortunately, we encounter so many things in one given day that we can become frustrated and lose site of what’s important and, sometimes, our ability to handle things we encounter.  Our lives are those of multitaskers, and while some of us are proud of the crazy quantity of stuff we can achieve in one day, I think it only increases our anxiety.  Many of us put a lot of self-inflicted pressure on ourselves.  We get tired.

Things that occur during the day can also create negative vibes for us and can shift us into being crabby or in a bad mood.  For example, my daughter was astonished at a person’s behavior yesterday.  She was volunteering at a charitable event and an attendee was absolutely rude to her.  I told her that there may have been a reason behind the woman’s behavior — you know, sometimes a reaction is because of something else that was encountered prior to the event.  I told her to let it go — it’s important because we don’t know the circumstances and the agitation is not necessarily against us – especially when you only encounter a person and they don’t even know you.  This person might have had an argument with prior to communicating with her, she may have had a hard day, someone in her family may have been giving her a hard time (it was a family event and sometimes these are trying when you have small children with you, and sometimes that, in itself is trying).  And, while it’s not o.k. to make excuses for someone else, it’s better then being caught up in their bad mood.  It has taken me a long time to realize this, and I have to catch myself from getting caught up in the moment (which does not always happen).  When you become frustrated, things can trigger you and only amplify your behavior (and you freak out a little).  I’m still working on realizing the triggers which push me towards a behavior I do not prefer, and sometimes it’s not until after the event that I realize what happened and, maybe, that I did not handle something the way I should have.  But, each day is a learning experience.  We learn so we can grow and change what we need to so we can have a better life.

And, many of us (me, me!) are totally inpatient.  Being inpatient, a hard day at work, or something else that we encounter during the day of high pressure that we inflict on ourselves really can wear us down.  I know, personally, that I expect too much from myself.

We are, after all, human.  I learn this from Jim.

After becoming exhausted, after having temper tantrums (admit it — we all do it sometimes!), he brings me back to reality.  “It’s not a problem, it’s an inconvenience”, he said recently.  Wow!  A light bulb went off and started me thinking!  Jim is a retired police officer.  He went on to explain that the only problem is when you have bullets flying by your head.  Good point.

I’ve always been a complainer.  After reading many self-help books over these past 2 years, I now understand that complaining brings negative energy to a person.  I wish I knew that sooner.  I grew up in a family of complainers, so  complaining is second nature to me.  In the mornings I’d usually list what the problems of the day were.  I always started it with “the only problem is_____” for my day — whether it was needing to get gas, trying to figure out how to fit things into the day time-wise, or making any statement.  Pretty much, something was always a problem.

One morning a few days ago, in response to my problem list, Jim gave me an example.  He explained that running out of coffee beans is not a problem, only an inconvenience.  “You can always just go to the deli and get a cup”, he said.  The light bulb again — there’s always a plan “B”.  I get it.  It makes sense!

OK, so I’m a little disappointed it took him 29 years to verbalize these amazing words of wisdom, but grateful he did.  “___________ is a problem” is no longer a normal daily statement that I make.

My mind triggers now if the bad 7 letter word (problem) comes out of my mouth and I immediately shift my thinking.  Realistically, nothing is a problem what a person can’t tackle by looking at it objectively, not just reacting.  When we just react it’s harder to find a rational solution to whatever the issue is.  And, I know that there is a solution to any problem if we just take a step back and figure out what to do next.  Although, after Jim’s words of enlightenment, nothing is really a problem, is it?

We make our own problems and worry.  I’m working so hard on stopping myself when I get into a cycle of down.  When you stop yourself and look objectively at something, things seem to work out.  And it makes for such a nicer day.

Hope your inconveniences are very minor and easy ones to solve.  There is a solution to any inconvenience.

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Embrace the timetoplay philosophy – you have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  It’s time to Enjoy Your Life!

The Serenity Prayer – A Challenge

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Did you ever wonder where the Serenity Prayer came from or what the intention was when it was written?  I googled and found this on a website  http://www.thevoiceforlove.com/serenity-prayer.html  and I have reposted, as follows:

Serenity Prayer:  God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.  Thevoiceforlove.com further noted that the “prayer” was written by theologian Reinhold Niebuhr in the late 1930s to early 1940s as part of a sermon he was giving and that the widely known prayer is abbreviated and the entire prayer reads:  Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen.

I’ll get back to this in a few moments.

I’ve been thinking a lot the past few days and talking to people that have made me think even more.  For example, I recently learned of an organization called Head Start.  How blind we are (I know this is true because so many people I asked didn’t know what the organization was) in our own Communities!  I have passed the sign a million times driving past.  I thought it was just a preschool.  It’s not.  It’s a place where children who come from families earning less than $17,000 per year apply to attend (and they have a huge waiting list) where they provide education and resources to the children and the families – the children so they can, hopefully, be on an even par with more privileged children when they start elementary school, and families to help them get on their feet and “make it”.  And, get this, the organization was formed in the 1960’s.  Think we should know about it?  I was speaking with someone yesterday and we discussed the Head Start Program, and talked about how it had been invisible to me, and she said that was because it was not in my reality, as it helps our society achieve and is intended to fight poverty.  Realistically, this type of program should be in each of our realities, which leads to point out that a major mission of www.timetoplay.com is people helping people.  We are all each others people and should care about each other and help each other.

OK.  More thinking.  My daughter is 17.  She has been telling me about children in her school who have given up and have no desire to strive to get ahead, they have a “what’s the use” attitude.  I was quite disturbed yesterday during our discussion, and this isn’t the first discussion of this type I’ve had with my children.  My 20 year old told me the same thing that he’s noticed about many of his peers.  Many of his friends, he noted, know that it’s hard to find jobs, and that many view the job opportunities as low paying without job security, and that they’ve given up before they’ve even gotten started.  And then there is the alarming rate of depression and suicide in our Country, a tabu topic.   The following national youth suicide statistics were posted on http://www.teachervision.fen.com/education-and-social-issues/mental-health/57131.html#ixzz1yQlQZiWt.  I’ve included the statistics I felt were most disturbing:    suicide is the third leading cause of death for teens, suicide is second leading cause of death in colleges, that for every suicide completion, there are between 50 and 200 attempts, that the CDC (center for disease control) performed a Youth Risk Survey which showed that 8.5% of students in grades 9-12 reported a suicide attempt in the past year, that 25% of high-school students report suicide ideation (thoughts).  Probably the most disturbing was their notation that a recent survey of high-school students found that almost 1 in 5 had seriously considered suicide; more than 1 in 6 had made plans to attempt suicide; and more than 1 in 12 had made a suicide attempt in the past year.  And this is just teens.  There’s plenty of statistics for adults, including our returning soldiers, and the statistics for people with depression are crazy, too.  The CDC posted 7/11 that depression affects 1 in 10 US adults http://www.cdc.gov/Features/DataStatistics.html. These statistics and conditions show complete dissatisfaction people have in life and that they’ve given up.

Lastly, another thing that always has bothered me is how people jump on causes when it affects them.  How many people do you know that never worried about people affected by breast or another type of cancer until they or their loved one got it?  Or MS, or Diabetes, or Autism or Alzheimer’s . . . it’s an endless list.  I know we can’t all fight for everything, but shouldn’t we care about each other all the time?  Who is affected with a condition, who is struggling, etc.  Religious or not, everyone has heard of the 10 commandments.  One reads, “thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself”.  We’ve become so far removed from this.  I told you, I’m always thinking. . . I came up with something I call the Pilgrim Philosophy.  Early settlers relied on each other for survival.  We worked together to keep our communities strong.  We all had a job and a purpose, a place to live, food.  I feel we’ve become socially isolated, striving, alone for survival.  And with conveniences of texting, email, and other electronic communication media, we have less face to face time with others.  Could this be contributory to the statistics on suicide and depression?

What can we do?  First, this isn’t Doreen’s project to change the world.  She CAN’T do it alone.  This is people helping people, communities helping communities, businesses helping businesses, to succeed and to enjoy life.  We can’t wait for someone else to fix it.  The thought process of “Not in my reality” can’t exist.  Guess what — this is our reality.  And, ever hear of NIMBY (not in my backyard)?  Guess what — rich or poor, this is in our backyard.

So, how does the Serenity Prayer enter into this?  I think it encourages complacency.  Especially the long version.  “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change”.  Is there really something we can’t change?  Think about it.  I truly believe that working together, people helping people, we can change anything.  I challenge you — and all of us — to make things change.

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Embrace the www.timetoplay.com philosophy:  You have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  Check out www.timetoplay.com to get resources for a better life.  Read tips and read articles from amazing professionals to help you have a better life.  It’s time to enjoy life!

Foster Bold Dreams, Bolder Actions

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I‘ve been reading The Everyday Entrepreneur written by Rob Basso.  Chapter 5 was one in which I found myself reflecting on things I have been working on or thinking about, and wanted to share.

The chapter started off with pensive statements about what sets a WILDLY successful person apart from others: “Imagination, a solid plan of action and determination to break down barriers” (p. 71). Rob noted that the challenge to achieve is the main difference between true entrepreneurs and complacent business people. Hmm. This is something I need to reflect on. In my life I was complacent to get a job, to feel secure, to get a check. There was a course I recently took where they used an acronym for JOB: Just Over Broke. Interesting, right?

So, for most of my life I played it safe, had my 9-5 (or 6 or 7 and weekends) job and that was it. Do you have something in your heart you want to achieve? I know I do. It’s a burning, energetic feeling – and it drives me forward. This brings me to the “no regrets” / follow your heart sentiment noted by Ken Davenport on page 80, where he was headed to study law in college but went into theatre instead, “he decided to study acting so that he would have no regrets later in life about what could have been.” Can we all do this? Do we have the luxury? In my case, no. Early on I had to get a full time job to support my family. I was 17 at the time. But, my path seems to have led me to where I am now, to a life I believe has been filled with achievement. I have learned things I know I would never have learned if things went differently in the beginning. And now I’m using what I’ve learned to propel what’s in my heart. It’s never too late.

What is one to do if you have a passion, if you have an idea, if you have a desire? Well, Rob did cover that, too! Pretty much what I’ve been doing working on the www.timetoplay.com project – on page 83 he talks of Mr. Scott Snibbe of Snibbe Interactive who had to fit his artistic pursuits around his schoolwork first, and then his professional career, while developing his company. In off times you can make it happen. For me, I rarely watch TV. I find myself thinking and planning and researching when I do have down time to make things happen. I “squish” it in. Remember the “NO REGRETS” statement? That’s one of the goals for www.timetoplay.com. To bring people resources so they will have no regrets. To remind them to enjoy life and to learn what they need to know so they can. In this case, following your dreams and doing what you love is one thing, maybe the most important thing, in the world to a person so they can enjoy life.

I know so many people who hate what they do in their career but become “STUCK”. They wake up every day and are exhausted, stressed or frustrated because they have to go to work. Can you change this? Maybe you can by fitting in some type of time to make it happen. . .

Rob’s Entrepreneurial Insight on p. 83 is “Find the space to nurture and grow your new pursuits”. Maybe it’s not to become an entrepreneur and start your own business, but maybe it is to study law, dance, guitar. . . something that you’ve wanted to do and think about all the time. Do you have something in your heart that you wish or want to do?

Do it.

Make it happen.

Rob also included an interview from David Becker, president of Philippe Becker Design, Inc. who noted that, “human nature [is] to trash new ideas”. Don’t let that stop you, either. In my experience, there are a lot of people out there who are so negative towards change and will push you down. Advice? Rob notes that you need people who support you to surround yourself with and perseverance. “I’ve got nothing to lose. . . what’s the worst that can happen? We won’t get the business. Or the best? We will get the business. But I can’t be afraid of what might happen.” David Becker, p. 82.

Onward and upward!

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Embrace the www.timetoplay.com philosophy:  You have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  Check out www.timetoplay.com to get tips and read articles from amazing professionals to help you have a better life.  It’s time to enjoy life and foster bold dreams!

Think and Grow Rich – by Napoleon Hill

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Think and Grow Rich (Napoleon Hill) - Blogging...

Think and Grow Rich (Napoleon Hill) – Blogging Bookshelf (Photo credit: The Booklight)

This was a most amazing book. Andrew Carnie, of steel manufacturing fame, charged Napoleon Hill with writing this book. It was written in 1937, took 28 years to complete the research, and was the summary (I guess that’s a good word) of the 500 most successful people of that time including greats like Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Jefferson, etc.

What an impressive book. I’m going to provide just a brief summary and I do encourage EVERYONE to read this.

Most of the book is directed to the state of mind. I truly have realized, during my journey in my quest for quality of life, that our mind is what imprisons us, what causes us to become a victim. It’s most important for us to exercise as much control over the chatter that enters as it can totally bring us down.

Another component of the book was about “nay-sayers” that told some of the greats of our Country that things were impossible, could never happen, etc. Believe it or not, “Doubting Thomases” even told Henry Ford he could never be successful producing the automobile! I have learned, over the past years of my quest, and had reinforced through Mr. Hill’s brilliant work, that “the mind could produce anything the mind could conceive and believe” (p. 285). This book has helped me see that. I know I’ve been held back believing in people who have told me “no” or that “it can’t be done” or “why would you bother”. Although I feel bad that I let this happen, I know you can’t go back (you know, the Eckhart Tolle Power of Now philosophy – there is no past, there is no future, there is only the present). So, we move forward.

What do you want in life? Feel it, believe it. Write it down. See it. Make it happen.

In Think and Grow Rich Mr. Hill reviews 13 principles which lead to success. I considered going through and summarizing each one, but, as stated in the preface, “this book contains the secret, which as been put to a practical test by thousands of people from almost every walk of life. [Andrew Carnegie] believed the formula should be taught in all schools and colleges, and expressed the opinion that if it were properly taught it would so revolutionize the entire educational system that the time spent in school could be reduced to less than half.” (p. vi)

He noted that the secret will appear in the book as you read it if you are ready for it.

Therefore, I chose to not divulge it. 

The book is an experience, one that I am pleased to have taken part. It created clarity and pulled together ideas and education I have been acquiring during these past two years in my quest for quality of life.

A final thought from the preface, written by Napoleon Hill in 1937 (p. xi): “All achievement, all earned riches, have their beginning in an idea! If you are ready for the secret, you already possess one half of it; therefore you will readily recognize the other half the moment it reaches your mind”.

Hmm. . . does that wet your appetite?

Happy reading!

Doreen

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Embrace the www.timetoplay.com philosophy:  You have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  Check out www.timetoplay.com to get tips and read articles from amazing professionals to help you have a better life.  It’s time to enjoy life!

Happiness for Dummies – W. Doyle Gentry, PhD

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Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Resized, renamed,...

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Resized, renamed, and cropped version of File:Mazlow’s Hierarchy of Needs.svg. (Photo credit: Wikipe

It’s been a while since I posted in this blog, mostly because I didn’t want to supersede the last blog post, Learning:  the Key to Enjoying Life.  But, I started reading the book, “Happiness for Dummies”, and figured I’d post what I’ve gleaned.  I’ve also put this on the www.timetoplay.com forum if you want to participate in the book review / discussion there. . .

I figured this book would be kind of fun and light — it’s not. The author summed up the book’s intention in the introduction: “Happiness for Dummies tells you how to fight for, create, and live a long and happy life. It makes you the master of your own happy destiny!” The book appears to be educational and thought provoking. The author (based on what I have read so far) has provided examples of happy people and ways to identify, learn, experience, and change. By the way — he’s noted Type B personalities are happier than Type A. I’m a type A. I expect a lot from myself. Hmmmmm. Something to consider as we go through this book.

LEARN — here’s that concept again. I’ve decided the key to enjoying life is to learn. Don’t just sit there. Identify what you need and then learn. Find out all the information you need to change, and then implement it. In the introduction the author also included this sentence re: happiness and its pursuit: “You wait for it to find you instead of exercising your right to pursue it”. Let’s not wait. Let’s learn and implement.

OK — so, let’s start the Happiness for Dummies discussion.

This is CHAPTER 1: Anyone Can Be Happy — and it’s going to be long.

Beginning on page 12, Dr. Gentry reviewed findings on 4 people who professed to be happy. Their common attributes were a strong family and parents who loved them and taught them to be positive. They volunteer and give back to others. They SMILE an encourage others around them to smile back. They are POSITIVE thinkers (that was worth repeating). One interviewee said he looks for opportunities to be happy and that he has a motto “only you can make it happen!” (p. 13). He also goes to bed each night reflecting on the positive things he did that day and wakes up each morning thinking positive thoughts. We’ve heard about being grateful and feeling grateful and making lists like these before. . . maybe something to implement? These people all participated in religious services. One said his wife taught him to loosen up and enjoy life and see the glass half full instead of half empty. The author summarized that they all believe happiness is something you have to work at — it doesn’t just happen. So, that’s definitely important to consider — all hope’s not lost, right? Another points re: the commonalities of these people that Dr. Gentry interviewed — people believe happiness comes with age. He went on to review statistics on p. 15, where 28% of people 18 – 27 felt happy whereas 38% of people 68-77 felt happy. He noted that people who are older realize that life’s not perfect, they realize you have to accept it for what it is. I guess that means they don’t put as much pressure on themselves as people who are younger do. They’ve accepted things for what they are. . .

Dr. Gentry briefly introduced that married people are happier, something that will be embellished in chapter 16 and chapter 20 — so we’ll get to that shortly.

Dr. Gentry discussed Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Something I remember studying in college. Now I wish I paid more attention! I’m going to interpret the hierarchy of needs to being a journey — 5 levels that Dr. Maslow identified — 1) meeting your basic survival needs; 2) safety — including financial (see? timetoplay.com philosophy is on the ball! if you don’t have money, at least to eat, you can’t enjoy life); 3) feeling loved and needed by others; 4) having self-esteem – liking yourself and feeling respected; and 5) feeling like you got “there”, that you’ve reached your full potential. Maybe people get stuck and #5. I know, since starting timetoplay.com, I’ve realized I had been stuck at #5, not feeling like I had made “it”, evaluating my situation and feeling like I still have to strive or prove something to myself. I know this feeling was based in my childhood. That’s a story for another time. Like Mr. Tolle, Dr. Gentry notes that you cannot look for happiness in power, status, wealth and success. That if this is how you’re trying to get to happiness you will end up being unhappy. I realize that now and have, through the learning journey of developing timetoplay, have been learning to enjoy life and live in the moment. It’s not been easy. It’s a process, right?

Dr. Gentry goes on to discuss how negative emotions narrow your thinking and cause frustration, how positive produces a “high”, feelings of excitement, and an increase of productivity. He discusses the importance to release positive endorphins through creative activity, exercise, fellowship with others, prayer, laughter (noted to be very effective for pain management and healing, too!), being surrounded by things of beauty and healthy sexual encounters (I know people are thinking about that last one).

This was a great tip — replacing negative emotions with positive emotions. It was noted that you cannot feel angry, upset or sad if you replace it with a positive feeling, that you can’t be angry and happy at the same time. DEFINITELY a good tip that all of us can easily try.

Blood pressure: Being angry or upset can increase blood pressure. We have heard that this can cause heart attack and stroke, too. Our minds can do terrible things to our body, causing depression and sickness — Dr. Gentry referenced a study by Dr. Barbara Fredrickson who wrote a thesis on how positive emotions can undo the effects of stress, how the simple use of touch or petting a pet can decrease blood pressure. Something to look into. . .

Dr. Gentry discussed being mindful and staying in the present moment. We did learn a lot from reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle — if you haven’t read the forum/discussion on that, it is available in the book club/review section. Over 2600 people have gone into that thread, and I hope it’s helped them. I realize it’s very hard to implement this all the time. The intention is to be aware of your feelings at each moment and to change things to stay positive, to focus on how you feel, to not worry, not wait for things to happen (to make them happen), to not dwell in the past or the future because all you really have is the present moment. There is no past and the future isn’t guaranteed. Pretty pensive, right? Again, I realize I forget to stay in the present. I have to be more mindful of this. And, regarding lingering in the present moment, Dr. Gentry discusses on p. 22/23 about Type A personalities always moving forward because we have too much to accomplish. Since starting TimetoPlay.com I’ve realized this has always been me. Not taking a few minutes to see the beauty around me, to appreciate what I have, what is happening, just being present. This is not something I know I can snap my fingers and make happen. It’s a constant realization that I have to be present to absorb, enjoy, reflect. I have been trying to be more aware. I was driving the other day and realized the beauty of the blue sky, I have been noticing the buds on the trees and the way the trees and plants are becoming ready to “pop” with splendor for the spring. I noticed how pretty my daughter’s hair looked the other day. The little things. The things we miss when we’re rushing around. Dr. Gentry suggested allowing time in your busy day for a few moments of happiness. This, as well, is the timetoplay.com philosophy. Even if you can only take 5 minutes for another cup of coffee to enjoy. . . something. . . and, although I forget EVERY day to do this, I’m definitely doing it more.

Last thing for chapter 1 — something to really consider — Dr. Gentry gave an example of a man who had an abusive childhood home with alcoholic parents. He had an underlying protective mechanism that he wasn’t able to be happy because if he started to be happy, his happiness could be taken away. This was because of his explosive childhood situation. In summary, sometimes past experiences might prevent you from letting yourself enjoy life. It’s something that, after a bit of self-reflection and realization, you might need to speak with a mental-health professional to work through. I realize I had been angry for 30 years — not on the surface, but, apparently it was there. Hence the reason I had to “make it”. I never did go to a psychologist, but it is something to consider. While based on Mr. Tolle’s book, we’re not supposed to dwell in the past, I do feel that it’s important to realize that, sometimes, it’s not easy to let things go, that we’re terribly hurt deep down. However, it’s not something that should hold us back. One of the goals for timetoplay is that, in the end, we should have no regrets. That we need to enjoy life. It stands to reason that, if you live in the past and dwell on that situation, regrets will be forefront in your life. So, this goes back to learning what we need and getting the resources to change.

So much for “Happiness for Dummies” being a light, fun book. This one’s definitely going to be work, too. You would never guess it from the title as it certainly minimizes things, but I think it will be time well spent.

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Embrace the www.timetoplay.com philosophy: you have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  It’s time to enjoy life!

Learning: The Key to Enjoying Life

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I think I’ve finally got it.  I think I’ve finally figured out how to enjoy life.  I had an “ah ha” moment (thank you Jim Ryan for the terminology of Ah ha moments).  I think the key to enjoying life is learning.

Here’s some of my thoughts on how learning can help you enjoy life.  I realize it’s kind of simple:

  • Learn what you need so you can enjoy life – there are so many resources out there.
  • Learn from past mistakes
  • Learn from life experiences:
      • Learn who you want to be friends with, who makes you happy, who makes your life better, who makes you feel badly about yourself and, therefore, who you should not “hang out” with
      • Learn what makes you happy
  • Learn what you can to make your life better
  • Learn what you need to make your life what you want it to be
  • Learn to be what you want to be in your career
  • Learn how to do something you’ve always wanted to do
  • Learn to live in the “NOW” and to observe the little things that you’ve been missing because you’ve been too busy to notice
  • Learn a new skill and how to make money
  • Learn how to eat healthy
  • Learn how to communicate with your kids
  • Learn how to be a community again.

I’ve realized, as it pertains to myself, that stress is brought about by the pressure we put on ourselves in our daily lives.  And, when you look at society, I think this has a big part of why people are ill or depressed now-a-days.  How many of us can be described as “tormented” souls.

So, I’ve determined that, at least for me, learning is the key to enjoying life.  And, that’s the true reason I started www.timetoplay.com.  It was my way to learn how to enjoy life.  I’ve learned so much, so far, from the amazing professionals that are part of this people-helping-people project, and know I will continue to learn how to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance because of the amazing things they write.

And, I have learned from the books I have been reading that have been recommended to me as part of this project, books I would never have read.  Learning is the answer.

There is a solution to every problem, and, as Eckhart Tolle noted in his book, The Power of Now, problems are created by our mind.  So, I will continue to seek out what I need to “fix” the “problems” that I have created because I have not taken the time to learn a better way because of being too busy or too overwhelmed.  You know you get caught up in the momentum of the day to day.

Through all of these resources, I’ve learned that I can be more in control, and look forward to continue learning.

I had a “woo hoo” type of day.  A day that was so long in coming.  And, I know there will be more to come.

I invite you to learn with me and join my journey of discovery to enjoy life.  It’s Time to Play.

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Embrace the www.TimetoPlay.com philosophy — you have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have quality of life.  It’s time to enjoy life.  Visit www.timetoplay.com to find resources for a better life.

P.S. — Totally check out the TimetoPlay.com discussion forum.  I’ve been working really hard to develop a discussion forum to include things we need to enjoy life.  It’s not a Facebook!  It’s a place to go and get what you need and then go out and do it!

The Power of Now, by Eckhart Tolle

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I started reading The Power of Now yesterday.  I’m only up to page 14, and have seen some promise in this book as part of my journey of discovery.  Bare with me — I have to ramble on a bit to explain things, and I’ll get back to the reason I’m referencing this book in a few moments.  Trust me.

I have to start from the beginning a little so you can see where I’m headed with this.   In 2010 Doreen (by the way, this is about me — just figured I’d tell the story about myself in this manner to make it a little more interesting) was turning 45 years old.  She started to reevaluate her life, and, through situations and circumstance, started www.timetoplay.com, her quest for quality of life.  Don’t get me wrong, Doreen has a great life.  A wonderful, devoted husband, 3 lovely children and a house.  She knows she has more than many, but there was a hole.  Having worked in healthcare for over 24 years, Doreen has seen sick and sad and people with regrets.  If you read the about us on the timetoplay site you will see that she noted that she’s always been searching, never seeing the beauty, joy, etc. around her — she’s always been just too busy.  And, at this point, she realizes she’s created this “busy-ness” as her reality.

We know that so many things get in the way of enjoying life — something I’m sure a majority of the people feel day-to-day.  We just try to get through the day, right?  Getting up, getting everyone out of the house, getting to work, being exhausted, heading home, making/having dinner, falling into bed REALLY exhausted, and starting over the next day.  Days become weeks, the year flys by. . . you know what I’m talking about.  Doreen realized she missed out on the little things, the beautiful sunny day, the smile, the bird chirping.  So, here comes the idea for timetoplay.com.  She has this brainstorm, “If I feel this way, how many other people are in the same rut?”

So, to the present — I (with a lot of help from Leta) built timetoplay.com to help myself learn how to enjoy life, and I figured I’d take a million people along with me.  The timetoplay philosophy is you have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance.  All these areas are so important, HOWEVER, you can’t just identify / realize that you have a problem or obstacle, but you have to learn things you can do and easily implement so you can fix the problem or obstacle and . . . bottom line. . . ENJOY LIFE!  After all, we’re all here for a short time. And so many of us seem to be tortured now a days — society’s gotten so many people down. No job, no money, struggling to make ends meet. WHO HAS THE TIME TO ENJOY LIFE? We have to make this a priority. We deserve to enjoy life. Think about it. We do.

I’ve built an amazing team of professionals from whom I’ve already learned so much, and I encourage you to check out the resources on timetoplay.com so you can, as I intend to, have a better life and to enjoy life.

Back to The Power of Now:  I’ve only just started reading this book.  On page 12, the paragraph reads: “. . .The inability to feel this connectedness gives rise to the illusion of separation, from yourself and from the world around you.  You then perceive yourself, consciously or unconsciously, as an isolated fragment.  Fear arises, and conflict within and without becomes the norm”.  This paragraph is regarding enlightenment.  The author is speaking about a disconnect we may feel with our God, spirituality, or our being.  BUT, I also believe it is a disconnect between each other.  So many of us feel the weight of the world on our shoulders.  Again, re: job, financial security or bills, taking care of the family, etc.  Even if that’s not it, maybe we feel alone.  So many of us are so isolated today.  This brings us to the discussion of prescription drugs and how people are using them as a crutch or band-aid.  I have talked about band-aids before in blogs or things I’ve written.  We don’t look for the root cause, which is one of the goals for timetoplay.com.  Now we go to a doctor and say we feel this way or that way and they write a prescription.  Is is the doctor’s fault a person is addicted to a medication (see article I had referenced, Antidepressants used by 11 percent of Americans: https://timetoplay.com/blog/?p=204).

No, it’s not all the doctors, but US, looking for a way to escape a reality we can’t handle.  A reality society has created and we have created, ourselves.  If people were happy and enjoying life, I really don’t think they would be taking the medications to try to cope.  Other coping mechanisms people use to escape or pacify themselves are eating, alcohol, sex, exercise, smoking, anything in excess.  Anything they can use to try to regain control.

So, join me in my quest.  Here’s the place to join in on the discussion forum under book club and book reviewshttps://timetoplay.com/forum/showthread.php/63-THE-POWER-OF-NOW-by-Eckhart-Tolle?p=103#post103

Are you reading something that can help someone in their journey, as well?  Please post.  That’s the ultimate goal of timetoplay.com.  We all have something we can offer each other to help each other have a better life.  It’s time to enjoy life.

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Embrace the timetoplay.com philosophy:  You have to be happy, healthy, have money and a work life balance to have a better life.  It’s time to enjoy life.