As I sit here evaluating this morning…

Today I had a nagging dialogue in my mind regarding the state of my life, the uncertainty of it all, what we control, what we do not, and our expectations for where we may be in our life experience.

As I am at the beginning of my 59^th year, and with New Year’s Eve is tomorrow, I sit here evaluating things this morning.

With all of our children in their 30’s (my youngest this March), I realize that our family lineage may be ending. It’s really quite remarkable to acknowledge that our children may really not have children to carry on our gene pool and our family history. 

In the past, a good friend discussed her husband’s passing as “one day you just disappear”.  This never left me. In reality, that is an absolute.  When you watch the history channel, you see abandoned homes, abandoned neighborhoods… ghost towns.  Indeed, those who lived there did disappear.  But, a big take-away is that their “stuff” does not. 

That remains part of my evaluation and perspective today.  All our “stuff” is borrowed to bring us life enjoyment, a gift to use, for which I am beyond grateful. However, when you think and reflect today, evaluate what you have and take that into account.

So many of us live with our “stuff” being a tightening noose around their neck and cannot even enjoy these “things”.  So many people live with just that 1 week of vacation – if they even can take that – to unwind.  I don’t believe it should be that way.

Today, I also look at the current world around me, the repeating dialogue of those in the news determining the future of myself and my family. In my family there are those who see through the dialogue.  Unfortunately, there are those who are still so much a part of the matrix and continuing to comply with all that is being spewed.  Personally, I never will give anyone full control over my life experience, desiring to choose my own path forward and taking advantage of the freedoms that were bestowed to me by God.

Nevertheless, the “what’s next” seems louder today than usual, but remains so uncertain.  What I do know is that, when you feel uncomfortable in a current situation, it is most important to reevaluate and change that situation.  Whether that is a job that sucks your life blood from you, obligations that are displeasing, or anything else that, when you really think about it, creates that helpless or “stuck” feeling.

My quest for quality of life has always been to just have a nice day.  Really a simple premise.  Truly these last few years have been exhausting, and I am looking forward to a different life experience for 2025.

In that light, revisiting my goals to bring awareness and peace to others will be something that I re-kindle as I continue my own personal journey.

I believe we are truly useful in some manner until our last breath.

With much love and peace for the New Year,

Dor

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