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“I’m going to die soon”

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I love my life“I’m going to die soon.”  Yesterday I spoke with a relative who said this to me.  Not, thankfully, because she has any particular health reason for the statement, but because she bought a new couch.

I asked her to explain.

She discussed how she rationalized purchasing a new couch for her living room because she hated the couch she owned.  She further explained that she was 67 years old and going to die soon, that no one lives forever, and that because she has maybe 10 or 15 more years to live, and that it was perhaps a silly purchase.

I was, truly, taken off guard.

I asked her if that is the way to live…. to wake up every day and think you are going to die soon…

I, for one, do not have the desire to focus my attention on this inevitable issue.  Fortunately, I am not aware of anything that truly predicts the exact day and moment of our individual expiration dates, and I am grateful for that.

OK… one more story.  You’ll see my point for including it here in a moment.

During Thanksgiving dinner a few weeks ago, a relative in their 70’s asked another relative in their 70’s, “So, what hurts you?”  I actually turned to her and asked if she truly said that.

So, here’s my opinion.

You can be 67 and start a fabricated countdown that is a focus point of each day, making decisions based on your personal expected longevity.  You can be 70, or maybe you are only 20 years old for that matter – age does not really make a difference here – and focus on an ailment, or something else, that creates a negative focus in your life.

OR, you can focus on the joy of being here and savoring the NOW.

I did not always have this mindset.  In my past I admit that I lived in frustration and “wished” my life away (for example, can’t wait till the weekend, can’t wait till the kids can do this stuff themselves, can’t wait till I finish college) in times when I felt challenged.  My only regret is that I did not learn to appreciate the NOW much earlier in my life experience.

A few years ago I read a book by Eckert Tolle entitled The Power of Now, where he noted that there is no past, there is no future, there is only the now.  Think about that.

Yes, sometimes we may dwell on things that happened in the past.  So many times this can effect our life for many years, sometimes in a negative manner, where we blame or makes excuses about our current situation based on something that had happened.  Keep in mind, whatever this may have been, we cannot change it.  In my recent past I have realized that it is our choice whether we want to let that “whatever” situation keep us stuck and paralyzed.  I have learned now that we only have the ability to move forward, but — I’m repeating it because it’s important — that it is our choice to do so.

And then there is Mr. Tolle’s statement that there is no future…  Yes, we plan for the future, as I believe we should.  We choose a career, have goals, plan and look forward to things.  Where would we be if we had nothing to look forward to?  I plan, and strive, and do; but, now I realize that we cannot 100% control how anything will turn out.  Personally, I love looking forward to amazing things to come, and expect only the best outcomes that will fulfill all of my desires.

Lastly, the fact (or concept) that there is only the NOW:  Only the present — this moment, this second, this day.

In my present life I choose to embrace this concept.

Mind you, I’m not perfect.  There are still times were I find myself dwelling on things that happen, or at times, still let things “in” that affect my personal behavior.  BUT, I am proud that I now recognize when this is happening, STOP and then shift my thinking.  Where something may have, in the past, affected me for a period of time, I am proud that I have developed an awareness so that a situation no longer effects me for too long.  I have also, and this is very recent, adopted a new mindset where I no longer hold things in that bother me.  I have recognized that not communicating only harbors negative feelings and frustration.  It’s a scary thing, but if someone says something or does something that bothers me, I tell them.  I recognize that we all are a work in progress.  I have decided to, and consciously make steps to, make every moment as enjoyable as possible.

In my book, If I Knew Then What I Know Now, (www.IfIKnewThenBook.com) in the very last page in the “Parting Words” chapter, I did create an analogy that I will explain here.

Due to the fact that our society revolves around money, I used the dollar bill to explain my thought in the book.  So, take a dollar out of your wallet.  Go ahead and do it.  Trust me.

Now, look at that dollar.

We purchase things we need and things we want with our dollars.  So, let’s use this dollar to “pay” for this second of our life.  Imagine that every second of your day you are spending one dollar.  As there are 86,400 seconds in one 24 hour day, that equals $86,400.  Pretty visual, huh?

So, imagine spending $86,400 to pay for your irreplaceable time today.  Remember that every second is a second you cannot redo.

Will you spend your dollars to bring you joy, or will you spend them in a way that does not make you feel good?

Think about it.  Take a moment to reflect on your experience.  And, here’s a concept to consider: The fact that, every second, you have an opportunity to change your next second.

If you are enjoying how you are spending your seconds, keep going in that manner.  If not, maybe it’s time to shift something — a job, school, a relationship, or something else in your current life experience, and make a plan so that you can enjoy your next one.  I believe that we all have the power within us to change our experience.  Sometimes, perhaps, all it may take is the awareness that we want to have a different life experience, and to take one small step to get started in a new direction.

Maybe today is the “someday” that we shift our plan of action to make our next second amazing.

I plan to love all my seconds.  I recognize, after 50 years in my life, that it is MY CHOICE on how I want to feel, and it is a waste of my seconds to feel badly in any way.

There’s one more thing that I’m going to add here before I end this, something that might help someone in their quest for quality of life.  One of our board members of the Time to Play Foundation, at New Years, said that instead of just celebrating the one day, “Happy New Year”, why don’t we celebrate everyday:  “Happy New Day”.  I thought this was brilliant and have personally adopted this celebratory mindset.  Happy New Day to you — every day.  Every day is a clean slate and a new opportunity to celebrate life.

I hope this helps spark a thought in you, and that you pass this on to someone else who may need it.

After all, it is time to enjoy life. It is Time to Play.

Love, Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.

Do it anyway

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Do It AnywayWe have an amazing group page, on facebook, (Facebook Group Link).  As a result of a post by Mike Pastore and then a post by Nancy Gordon today, I received a huge inspiration to write my weekly reflection:  Do it anyway.

So, Mike started with this:  YOU DONT HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO CONTROL YOUR THOUGHTS; YOU JUST HAVE TO STOP LETTING THEM CONTROL YOU.

And, Nancy posted this letter written by Sherri Bessi:  Dear Human, You can’t give up:  You can’t give up on love because others are hateful. You can’t give up on believing in one another because you’ve been let down. You can’t give up on hope because pain came your way. You can’t give up on kindness because some people are cruel. You can’t give up on peace because war surrounds you. You can’t give up on dreaming because they don’t always come true. Life isn’t about everything being in order. Life isn’t about bliss. Life is about learning to live, love, hope and believe in the midst of perfect imperfection. Life is messy, complicated, confusing, and beautiful all at the same time. Life is the single best gift you have ever been given.

Then I posted this:  Mother Teresa’s Do It Anyway poem:

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.  If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.  If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.  If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.  What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.  If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.  The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.  Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.  You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God; It was never between you and them anyway.

I NOW believe we can talk ourselves out of doing something or we can “Do It Anyway”.  It’s taken most of my 50 years on this planet to realize the incredible power in each of us.  Just look around in this world.  EVERYTHING that is created was someone’s idea.  They just acted on their idea and made it happen.  From the creation of a poem, to a clock, to the very chair you are sitting on.  Someone had the vision to make it or to do it.  And, they did.  Don’t let your ideas go.  Do it anyway.

Negative self talk is probably the most paralyzing thing I’ve experienced in my lifetime.  We focus on the “what if’s”.  I’ve learned recently this is actually a fear that we have created for ourselves.  A fear that makes us stop in our tracks.

So, ask yourself – what’s the worst thing that can happen?

Also, ask yourself — what happens if you don’t try?

We have our Empower Half Hour Internet Radio station (see link) or you can go directly to the station (www.BlogTalkRadio.com/TimetoPlay).  This concept is something we discuss frequently, including the word “Should’ve”…  as in the use of “I should’ve”.  Have you ever said it?  It’s been noted in the internet radio show how this phrase should be “banned” from our vocabulary.  I absolutely agree.  Our discussions in the podcasts have given me great insight to improve my quality of life, and I hope you’ll join us.  So, in acknowledgement of this realization, now if I say “Should’ve” or I think it, I recognize that there’s something that I have fear about.

In life, in a perfect world, there should be no regrets from any one of us.  Don’t let someone else’s statements, prejudice, or their fear stop you from believing, loving, achieving, or creating.  Live your gift.  Don’t give up.

Do it Anyway.

After all, it is time to enjoy life. It is Time to Play.

Love, Doreen

PS — don’t forget to join the Facebook group to post and share inspiration and your stories — https://www.facebook.com/groups/124102350976973/

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.

Sober and Happy Holidays!

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sober holidays   The Holidays can be a challenging time for millions of people recovering from alcohol and drug addictions. People, places and things around holiday festivities can be triggers for relapse. 

Here are some tips you may consider that may be helpful for you.

  • Find new ways to celebrate! Host a party with your friends in recovery. Plan some fun recipes with non-alcoholic drinks and delicious foods.
  • Stay connected and share your triggers with someone close; you’re not alone-pick up the phone! 
  • Set boundaries with your friends and family members. Share where your head is at, and plan ahead together for family gatherings.
  • Watch for certain foods that may have alcohol-just the taste can be a trigger at times. Learn to say “No” in away that is comfortable for you.
  • Give yourself a little extra self care. Take some quiet time and work on an attitude of gratitude.
  • Smile-it’s definitely contagious!
  • Get involved in helping others; it takes us out of our own head at times. Help the family with whatever needs to get done.
  • Leave your judgement at the door, and don’t take things personally. Be proud of yourself and your accomplishments!
  • Focus on positive people and things. Be good to you! Then you can be there for others.
  • Dress nice, feel good, share hugs, learn something new, teach someone something, stay true to you!

and…SHINE!

 

Accountability

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accountabilityToday I learned about a 56 year old man who was killed riding his motorcycle.  He was killed by a 22 year old boy who tried to make a left turn.  Unfortunately, that left turn was made right into this motorcyclist as he was just driving along.

This wasn’t just a horrible accident, but this young boy had a prior history of driving impaired.  He should never have been behind the wheel yesterday, and has a previous E Felony conviction for DWI.

When he hit this motorcyclist, it was reported that he tried to flee the scene.  Once again he was found to be driving under the influence and has blood tests pending to determine what he had taken prior to getting behind the wheel.  In an aside, I have 3 children ranging in age from 24, 21 and 20, it breaks my heart to know that, at such a young age, he loses too.

I have been thinking about this all day today since I learned of the tragedy. I ride a motorcycle, too, but there is more to this situation.  It didn’t have to be a motorcyclist, but it could have been a mom taking her baby for a walk, or a boy with his dog, or a kid riding a bike or on a skate board.

So, here’s my usual disclaimer — I don’t intend to be preachy as I write the rest of my “weekly reflection”, but just kind of am working this situation through my mind.

We can blame a ton of things for our own personal lack of accountability.  This lack of accountability can be applied to every aspect of our lives.  It can be applied whether we cheat on a loved one, or cheat on a project we are assigned, or cheat on a situation at work, or if we somehow take advantage of someone, or if we don’t do as we promised.  In many situations, a lack of accountability for one’s actions, and the decision we make, can tragically and irreversibly impact the life and lives of others.

Unfortunately, I believe that we have become desensitized to the results of no accountability.  In the case of driving while impaired, or while under the influence, this happens again and again.  No matter how much education is provided.  No matter the efforts and advocacy by MADD and SADD.

The holiday season is upon us.  This gentleman’s family will be affected every Thanksgiving, remembering this tragic day of loss.  At 56 years old (I’m turning 50 next week), I am sure that he had so much more to do in his life.

In a situation where we may be driving, we all have an opportunity to embrace accountability, to designate a driver, and / or to make arrangements to stay overnight at a location or arrange for transportation home via a taxi.  WE each have the responsibility and accountability to not get behind that wheel when we are not capable to drive and risk hurting others.

In every situation, we all have the responsibility to be accountable for our actions, to not blame someone else for our actions.  This pertains to our health, our family, our place of business, and even our happiness.

If we each embraced personal responsibility, things would move along so much more smoothly.  Just think what would happen if we really considered our actions before we acted.

After all, it is time to enjoy life.  It is Time to Play.

Love,

Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see www.timetoplay.com for more information.

The Big Picture

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sun

Something hit me while I was in the kitchen this morning.  I saw the sun coming up through the trees.  I’ve seen this similar occurrence over these past 24 years living in our home.  But, this time it was different.  A little voice inside my head said, “The sun will continue to rise and set”.

That really put things in perspective for me.

The sun will rise and set with us or without us.  It does not matter.

Without causing anyone to feel disturbed or upset with me for my continued thought process surrounding this reality check, I’m going to share it here.  It’s your choice to read it or not, and to agree or disagree.

We are each just a small piece of the puzzle.  But, it hit me today how so many people, individually, thinks they are what the world revolves around.  How they think their problems are more important than other people’s problems, or the most important thing to the extent that nothing and no one else matters.

We also have seen such actions in Paris with this latest, unconscionable slaughter.  We know this is not the first such horrible circumstance, but something that has happened since the beginning of time.  Some person, somewhere, believes their way of life is the right way and tries to impose it on others.  We’ve seen this again and again throughout time with one people conquering, segregating, or persecuting another because they are not the same.  And, as we have seen, it gets sadly extreme.  Look at the holocaust.  Look at religious persecution.  Look at any and all types of discrimination.

I wrote in my book, If I Knew Then What I Know Now that history will continue to repeat itself if we let it.  Every day I can find situations – whether large or small – that we make this statement true.

At some point we have to realize we are all connected and that whatever our actions are cause a ripple effect.  We’ve seen this from the smallest gesture of just giving a person a smile – it can change their whole outlook, the course of their day and, perhaps, even save their life.

We are here on this earth for a very short time.  It is truly up to us, individually and collectively, to make the experience a pleasurable one for everyone, or one of despair.  I believe there is a solution for every problem if we can just take a moment to step back and really look at a situation and the options available to us to make a change.

Imagine what would happen if people chose love and happiness.

After all, I believe it is time to enjoy life.  It is Time to Play.

Love,

Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see www.timetoplay.com for more information.

Photo credit from: sharifahnorhamidah.blogspot.com/2014/03/blog-post_9368.html

 

The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side

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The Grass is Always Greener on the Other SideThis has been a topic of discussion that some of us at the Time to Play Foundation have been thinking and talking a lot about this over the past week.

This proverb has been around and passed down from generation to generation.  I talk about the wisdom of those who came before us in our book, If I Knew Then What I Know Now.  These idioms and proverbs interest me greatly.

The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side … Think about this for a moment.  Do you or someone you know always think they would be so much happier in a different life situation?

I believe this philosophy is actually dangerous to a certain extent.  Why?  Because each time you run toward something while running away from something, it may surely lead to becoming disappointment.

I actually tried to do this in the year 2004 when I decided that moving our family to Florida would be a solution, would give me peace (after all, life is hard, you know?) and a new way to start over. I was looking for “easier”.  Thankfully my husband is the voice of reason.  Moving, he said, would not solve anything, and that once the “honeymoon period” was over I would find life the same as before we would have moved.  We didn’t go, which did force me to reevaluate my life situation, evaluate potential options, and make changes that were more reasonable.

I believe we could apply this “running away from” theme to anything and everything in our life experience, relationship or job.  But, guess what?  The circumstance surrounding the concept of “it will be better when” does not necessarily provide a solution, and, sometimes potentially, can create more problems.

In many cases, the issue you are running from will follow you, because, perhaps, they start inside you.

The most important thing we can do is find peace and happiness in ourselves.  This is something we’ve been researching and working on, too (see PREinvent YOUR Life® article and survey for more info).  At this point in my life, I do not believe that there is anything tangible in this world that can fill a void inside of us:  not another person, not a new car, not a new home.  If there is unrest and despair in our hearts, we have to evaluate why and what we can do to start to heal.

I found an article that included this quote that I thought most appropriate here:  Buddha once said that the way to happiness is actually quite simple; the secret is to learn to want what you have and not want what you don’t have.  Again, I believe the secret to peace and happiness is in ourselves.

Robert Fulghum wrote, “The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. No, not at all. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you are.”

Nurturing ourselves is where we may have to start.  Take a moment today to stop and look deep inside.

We know what we need.

We sometimes just have to take the time to listen, evaluate our best options, stop reliving the past that keeps us “a prisoner” (chapter two of my book, “We are all tortured souls”), and move forward towards what we need to do so we can enjoy life.

After all, I believe everyone deserves the opportunity to enjoy life.

It is time to play…

Love, Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.

 

Image credit: simpledailychange.com

 

What is YOUR Impact on Others?

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impact jackie robinsonAsk yourself:  When you talk to other people… people you may work with, people in your family — your spouse, your siblings, your kids… do you encourage or discourage?  Do you propel a person to greatness or do you say something that can break their souls?

I’ve been thinking about this ever since Stacy Gertz, an amazing and important part of our Time to Play Foundation’s team, shared a video about a woman, Lisa Nichols, who was discouraged at 19 years old by teachers who told her she was a terrible writer and a terrible speaker https://youtu.be/Kcu92UlIQfs.  If you take a few minutes to listen to Ms. Nichols’ video you will also learn how she was in a situation where she was economically disadvantaged.  She said she found herself in a life situation where she said she was broken in every way.

How did this happen?  Could the words she heard while she was younger have impacted her in a negative way?  I believe they could have been a contributor to many years of her negative life experience.  She had a lot going against her.  She could have given up, but she found power within herself, against all obstacles, to change her life.

This is an observation I have made over these past years working on the Time to Play Foundation, a not for profit organization intended to inspire others and provide resources for a better life.

I believe that, sometimes, we live in too many years in the “what is expected of us” or the “I can’t”. 

After almost 50 years of my life, I have started to understand the power of “can’t” and the power of “not possible” that we seem so inclined to adopt; perhaps starting because of the opinions from others.  I’ve included here another really short and pertinent video (it’s only 1 minute and 16 seconds) that gives incredible examples of “can’t” that people overcame – people including Walt Disney, Lucille Ball, and more:  https://youtu.be/hzBCI13rJmA.

This story of “Can’t” is retold by so many again and again.

The good news is, I have learned it is ever too late for “CAN”.  Henry Ford was 45 years old before beginning to be successful.  Just look at the empire he built and his legacy.

I believe it is never too late for any of us.

I believe the “trick” is to encourage our younger generation via OUR impact vs. the need to unbury the “CAN” later in life after so many years of believing the “CAN’T”… to gain and to give the tips and tools from those who are older and have had the experiences that could save others some time.

To encourage others to PREinvent their life®, not reinvent, as so many do again and again.

In closing, again I ask…. What is YOUR impact on others?

Do you encourage and propel?

If the answer is no, I hope you will take the time to stop a moment and identify why not.

If the answer is yes, perhaps you can give me a call (631-331-2675 or email me doreen@timetoplay.com) so WE can move forward, together.  #PeopleHelpingPeople.

Just imagine the IMPACT, then.

After all, I believe it is time to enjoy life.

It is Time to Play…

Love, Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.

In Love With Being in Love?

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Romantic couple sitting on a sofa in a loving embrace laughing as they hold up a red paper heart for Valentines day

Are you in love with being in love? Well, to some extent, we all are. Being in love is one of the greatest joys of life. Let’s look a little deeper into this question; are you in love with the idea of being in love or do you want to be truly in love with a particular individual who will be your future partner? This is a shift that I work on with many of my coaching clients and workshop participants.

One of the questions that I frequently ask clients is, “What are the traits and values that are most important to you in a potential partner?” We call these your “Must-Have Traits.” Some answers that I often here are variations of: I want someone who will dance with me in the moonlight, who will walk with me on the beach, or who will cuddle with me on the couch. Now, of course, those are all great experiences and again, many of us desire that in our lives. But we want to get to the root of the love and ask ourselves, “Why do I want to dance in the moonlight with this person?” “What are his/her unique qualities and values that cause me to want to express that kind of affection?” Furthermore, “Why does he/she want to dance, walk, and cuddle with me?” “What are my unique characteristics that cause him/her to want to express that kind of affection?”

If we are not clearly in touch with the answers to those questions, then the romance is very likely to fizzle. If what is bonding us together is our love of being in love, then what we want most does not have the foundation to make it last. So, let’s formulate a well thought out vision, and let’s look for a particular person with the values, traits, and qualities that are most important to us. Then, let’s fall in love with a real person who possesses those characteristics, not with an abstract idea. As we slowly cultivate deep love with this person, then the dances and the walks and the cuddling can be authentic and lasting, way beyond the shallow fluff of romance in the media which leads us to be limited by our love of being in love.

Not listening Clogged My Chakra

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ChakraIn my book, If I Knew then What I Know Now, I wrote how there is so much wisdom in the past experiences of others and how people who have come before us left information behind for us to use in our lives.  I have also come to the realization that we don’t necessarily use this wisdom but reinvent… and reinvent… and reinvent “new” ideas.

Please don’t get me wrong.  I’m not trying to say we shouldn’t invent things that are new ideas.  People are forever thinking and dreaming, which is absolutely part of life and what moves society forward (perhaps that’s subjective depending on the subject – maybe we move backwards, sometimes, too).

However, introducing an idea of reflecting on what was learned in the past, and how the information could help us, was the best way I could think of to introduce the topic of this article and the following discussion.

I’ve been “dabbling” in learning about Chakras here and there over some years / months, but never really delved in.  Some people will say, “Oh, that’s hokey stuff”.  My husband is one of them.  BUT, I truly believe there is real validity in this knowledge.

Last night I sat at the kitchen table speaking with my daughter Jackie and her friend.  They are working very hard on reconnecting to “source”.  They are only in their early 20’s; and, with what I know now after many years of reading and learning, am so grateful that they are where they are at this point in their lives.  I only wish I had been more aware so I could have shared what they are learning now with them when they were younger.  At this point in their awareness, they have far surpassed my awareness, to which I am grateful.

So, after that long introduction and explanation, here’s what happened that has caused me, a person who will turn 50 in a few days, to consider this “new” concept that has been around well over 3,000 years.

I believe what I learned this past week was valuable.  For those who think it is “hokey”, that’s o.k.

But, hopefully, my sharing my story and experience will help someone else.

Anyone who knows me knows I am a little stubborn.  I get an idea in my head and, no matter what, I will strive to accomplish it.  But, here’s the bad part.  I don’t listen.  I don’t listen when people say it’s not the right path.  This past week, my not listening fully affected my body, as well.

Looking back over the years in my life, I realize that “not listening” to signs and experiences have adversely affected my health and my body many times.  Remember the Time to Play Philosophy is “happy, healthy, have money and work life balance”.  When we do not feel well, being happy and feeling healthy certainly are disqualified from this equation.  Perhaps, based on the circumstances, we lose the “have money and work life balance”, the other two parts of the time to play philosophy, too.

BUT, if we are listening, we can circumvent a negative life experience.

So, this past week I actually created a physical illness in what I’ve learned was my root Chakra while fighting for something that I was told was not the right move.  I, myself, believed it was and was going to do everything I could to move forward.  And then, this past Thursday night, not only did I not sleep, but became physically ill including an upset digestive system, fatigue and joint pain throughout my whole body.  It was at that point I “woke up”.  Armed with the little knowledge I had about Chakras, I realized there was a root cause to what I was feeling.

So I went to the all-knowing Google and searched for the symptoms of a blocked / clogged Root Chakra.

What I read was what I was physically experiencing.

I have been following Lisa Beachy and her morning wisdom for some months.  I knew she had a meditation for clearing the Root Chakra (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ol5rRFSC1_s – it is only 4 minutes long), which I took the time to complete. I included it here if you think that you may need it, as well.

Before this “aha” moment, I hadn’t really understood.

This whole experience was something I actually needed.  Almost 50 years of life did not give me the education that I did receive in this one stroke of awareness.  Once I listened, and “got it”, my body, physically and emotionally, started to become well.

I don’t intend to give anyone information that they may feel uncomfortable with, but kind of think this information has merit and is worth looking into and considering.

We all know we can make ourselves physically ill and have heard of people having a heart attack due to stress.

This chakra stuff has been around forever, originating in India between 1500 and 500 BC.  In my book I wrote how we make mountains out of molehills, and maybe investigating the Chakra system may be one path to search for what ails us and affects our quality of life.

BUT, please note – this is not an easy fix.  From what little I understand, the Chakra system starts with our mind and our thinking, two areas that may be the hardest to affect.

Something else I finally “got”:  How our emotions are our guide if we are doing something we should or if we are not.  I have been learning this, telling people this and reading about this, but, again, didn’t “get it”.  Hopefully now that I understand a little better what this whole emotional guiding system is, I can use it to better enjoy my life.  The concept makes sense, but reading and saying is much different than doing because you “get it”.

I learned I need to “Just Listen”.

Here is a table of information I found which includes a “Chakra Aches Index”:  http://www.inner-truth.net/healing/chakras/chakras.html

Additionally, please go to www.spritualgirlfitness.com and download Lisa Beachy’s “How to Eat for Your Chakras”.  I believe that the easy to understand information I listened to yesterday, and wisdom she imparts on her audio program, (it’s 38 minutes long) was very valuable to me.

If you are feeling crappy in any way – headaches, exhaustion, joint pain, etc., it may really be worth a few minutes of time to listen and look into.  I believe the whole thing makes sense and is useful to have in our “toolbox” of skills for life.

I know that every day is a learning experience.  I know it gets tiring to hear me say that, but, it’s true.  No matter how you think you’ve “gotten it”, learning is continuous.  I, personally, do not believe that any one of us is an “expert” in life, nor do I believe that any one of us is perfect.

We can just try the best we can.

Hoping my “aha” gives you an “aha”!

After all, I believe it is time to enjoy life.  It is time to play…

Love, Doreen

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Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.

 

Lessons of Time and Choice

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losing track of timeAt this point in my life I truly realize that every day is a learning opportunity.  Sometimes I wish the lessons didn’t take so long to get here.

Yesterday I went to the wake of a dear friend’s mom.  We hadn’t physically seen each other in over 20 years.  I think the last time was at our 10 year high school reunion.  We had been the best of friends all through high school, and, if I remember correctly, junior high, too.  We had participated in countless sleepovers and events – and then she moved away to go to college and we lost touch.  Our only connection for these past years has been the holiday cards sent to each other.

Seeing her yesterday at the wake for those few moments made me truly wonder.  Of course, firstly, I wonder where in the world had the time gone???  How could it have been possible that so many years have passed?  Time does go by so fast, and of course every day is filled with priorities.  But, every day we are lucky to have we are also lucky enough to have a new opportunity.

The swift passing of time is not an unfamiliar realization.  I’ve certainly heard people express this same sentiment before.  It is so easy to lose track of time.  Personally, my days are filled to the brim with things that I “have” to do.  In my personal experience, one day just rolls into the next.  The week is gone, the month is gone, the year is gone… you get the idea.

I woke this morning thinking about this and asking myself how she and I could have lost touch and how we allowed so many years to pass in this manner.

So, there it is… the lessons of time and choice. 

With this being said, I think about the saying, “Don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today”.  In my book, If I Knew Then What I Know Now, (www.IfIKnewThenBook.com) I wrote how I marvel how someone, somewhere had said all these amazing quotes and sayings that have been passed down through the years.  They had “been there and done that”, and gave us all these secrets to have a better life.  There is so much wisdom from the past if we pay attention.

“Don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today”:  What is something you have wanted to do and/or a person you have wanted to call?

Perhaps today is someday.

I’ve definitely been crossing things off my “bucket list” of things I want to do; but, what about all of those other things that I should do?  We will make time in our busy lives if we really want to make the time.

Truly the days go by so fast.  Don’t let another pass you by without touching someone you “should” call.

If you “should” do it, you probably should actually make it happen.  I know I “should” have.

What do you CHOOSE to do today?  How can you make those things a priority?  And, if your day, like mine, is filled with the what I “have” to do’s, it may be time to reevaluate the “have to” and figure out how to create a schedule that suits life and love and freedom to do those things that we “should” do.

I certainly plan to reevaluate things a little.

After all, it is time to enjoy life.  It is Time to Play!

Love,

Doreen

Doreen Guma, MA, FACHE, CPC, CLC is a board certified healthcare executive, a certified professional life coach, the founder of the Time to Play Foundation, a 501c3 not for profit corporation inspiring everyone to enjoy life and author of If I Knew Then What I Know Now, Our Quest for Quality of Life.  The concept behind time to Play and the Time to Play Foundation was absolutely created out of LOVE. Please see https://timetoplay.com/ for more information.