In Love With Being in Love?

In Love With Being in Love?

Romantic couple sitting on a sofa in a loving embrace laughing as they hold up a red paper heart for Valentines day

Are you in love with being in love? Well, to some extent, we all are. Being in love is one of the greatest joys of life. Let’s look a little deeper into this question; are you in love with the idea of being in love or do you want to be truly in love with a particular individual who will be your future partner? This is a shift that I work on with many of my coaching clients and workshop participants.

One of the questions that I frequently ask clients is, “What are the traits and values that are most important to you in a potential partner?” We call these your “Must-Have Traits.” Some answers that I often here are variations of: I want someone who will dance with me in the moonlight, who will walk with me on the beach, or who will cuddle with me on the couch. Now, of course, those are all great experiences and again, many of us desire that in our lives. But we want to get to the root of the love and ask ourselves, “Why do I want to dance in the moonlight with this person?” “What are his/her unique qualities and values that cause me to want to express that kind of affection?” Furthermore, “Why does he/she want to dance, walk, and cuddle with me?” “What are my unique characteristics that cause him/her to want to express that kind of affection?”

If we are not clearly in touch with the answers to those questions, then the romance is very likely to fizzle. If what is bonding us together is our love of being in love, then what we want most does not have the foundation to make it last. So, let’s formulate a well thought out vision, and let’s look for a particular person with the values, traits, and qualities that are most important to us. Then, let’s fall in love with a real person who possesses those characteristics, not with an abstract idea. As we slowly cultivate deep love with this person, then the dances and the walks and the cuddling can be authentic and lasting, way beyond the shallow fluff of romance in the media which leads us to be limited by our love of being in love.

Authored by: Heidi Krantz

Heidi Krantz
OTR, CPC - “From Breakup to Break-through!”

Heidi Bernstein-Krantz, OTR, CPC, is a Professional Life Coach with a specialty in divorce. She is the founder of Reinvention Life Coaching, a motivational speaker, and a published author. Heidi is certified by The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), an internationally accredited program.

Based upon her personal and professional experience with the divorce process, Heidi empathetically guides her clients to feel comfortable, supported, and increasingly self-confident. Coaching focuses on successfully navigating through all the changes that permeate life during divorce, including social, parenting, career, and financial upheaval. Within the coaching alliance, action plans that feel achievable and realistic are formulated, and goals are consistently met.

Heidi’s interactive workshops, seminars, and “Moving On” Groups empower many to shift into a more positive consciousness and to create opportunity during this challenging life transition.
www.reinventionlifecoaching.com

coachheidik@gmail.com
Heidi's Podcast Link: From breakup to breakthrough -- how to move forward in 2012.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *